I have two profile features that will be published on the CYC blog by Aug. 5. I am also scheduled to write the two August profiles (since I made contact and did interviews while I was still at the organization), which will be published later this month.
7/12/16: AT&T donates $10K to CYC in continued support of mission (press release)
7/8/16: Dr. John Bryant, heart focused on children (profile feature)
6/24/16: CYC hits a home run with Reds Day celebration (news story)
6/24/16: Students celebrate great success at CYC cookout (news story)
5/27/16: Ambition and CYC puts student Mariah Brantley a step ahead
I had to shorten the article (with some rewriting) to include in CYC’s monthly newsletter. I made it more of a profile piece on Mariah, eliminating most of the information of the donors behind the scholarship since I felt it wasn’t applicable. It was more focused on the husband and wife behind the scholarship rather than the scholarship itself.
The original draft is 745 words. My edited version is 411 words.
5/26/16: Norwood seniors receive over $1.5 million in college scholarships
The lede in the original draft had nothing to do with the article, so I eliminated it.
I moved the scholarship dollar amounts up in the story since that is the story. It’s impressive that 80 seniors managed to land over $1.5 million in scholarships. That shouldn’t be buried — as it was in the original draft.
I contacted the writer for a list of colleges since he only mentioned UC Blue Ash, UC, NKU, and Wright State in his version. He emailed me a spreadsheet with a breakdown of all colleges who participated and how many seniors are going to each one. Providing those details gave the revised story more depth.
This is the first headline I wrote.
The original draft is 274 words. Even with the cutting and revising I did, my version came in at 275. I find it rather amazing that I was able to maintain the original word count, but yet come out with a somewhat different story.